


The Angel Who Felt

by fanvergent



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, One Shot, POV Castiel (Supernatural), Team Free Will (Supernatural), True Vessels (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:08:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26459965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanvergent/pseuds/fanvergent
Summary: This is my first ficHope y'all like it :)
Kudos: 2





	The Angel Who Felt

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic  
> Hope y'all like it :)

Sam and Dean Winchester were special.

Cas had always known that.   
He had often heard the angels talk about them in hushed whispers- the true vessels of Michael and Lucifer.   
Considering that the brothers were to bear the two most powerful archangels, the most ancient of beings, who could kill hundreds with nothing but a flick of the wrist, it was quite unsurprising that they were different from others of their kind.

But the minute he rescued the fated righteous man from the dreary pits of hell, the moment he first laid eyes on the infamously and dangerously codependent brothers, he knew that their remarkability had absolutely nothing to do with their destiny.

Castiel was young by angel standards. He was not yet born when Michael and Lucifer trapped the Darkness together. He had - thankfully - never seen the massive fights that had ensued in heaven, the fights that the angels spoke of with great fear. He was not born when Lucifer betrayed his family and his father, by creating the twisted, corrupt demons. He had not witnessed the even greater brotherly betrayal, when Michael himself cast Lucifer out of heaven, throwing him into the cage, shattering that bond which the angels had believed unbreakable. But he had heard stories. Stories that told of how Michael had loved his little brother more than himself. 

Although it probably hadn't really been love, Cas thought to himself.   
After all, angels couldn't feel, not like humans did.   
This stone-hearted and unfeeling nature of the angels had never bothered him. He, like his brothers, had considered emotions to be a crutch, a chink in his armour. They were a path to corruption and doom.  
But now, he was not so sure if they were, indeed, a weakness.

Sam and Dean were, in every way, perfect vessels for his older brothers; the parallels between them were uncanny.  
Dean, the older brother, had been brought up as a soldier, obeying his father's every order without question, following happily in his footsteps. On the other hand, Sam had always been unsatisfied and upset with his hunting life. He was stubborn and headstrong, and was in constant disagreement with his dad.

Yet the disparities between the Winchesters and the two archangels made all the difference.   
Sure, the difference seems small when compared to the plethora of similarities, and is quite easy to overlook. But it should never be mistaken as trivial.  
For the Winchesters' love for each other comes before everything and everyone else.

Michael's loyalty to his father overshadowed his apparent love for his brother.  
But Cas knew that Dean would rather die than hurt his baby brother.   
In this one matter, the older Winchester was unwavering, steely. Cas had no doubt that Dean would go against anyone to keep Sam safe, including his own father.   
And Sam, for all his past mistakes, would do the same, unhesitantly, staunchly.  
The brothers’ profound bond and affection is unshaken and unshakable. Despite their differences and mistakes, they have stood by each other, never giving up on each other, forgiving each other.

Forgiveness. Another sentiment lacking in angels. Perhaps it would have been better if they were capable of forgiveness; a million years is too long a time to hold grudges.   
Cas remembers Anna, the fallen angel. She had been happy to remain human. Cas hadn't understood why at that time.   
He did now.

Yet another thing about the Winchesters that amazed him was their strength of will.  
He would never have believed that mere humans could resist both angelic and demonic forces, and overcome every sort of pain, fear and loss to forge their own path. Driven simply by their unending love for each other, and their natural instinct to put each other first.   
A path that is controlled by no one but them.   
A path of free will.

Perhaps angels are not as superior to humans as they believe. Perhaps emotions are not a weakness, but a strength, motivating one to do even the inconceivable.   
Ever since he met the Winchesters, Cas had been questioning everything that had been drilled into his head all through his long existence.   
Questioning all those beliefs and rules, and rejecting every last one of them.

And as the Winchesters turned from simply his responsibility to his friends, and then to his family, Castiel did what no other angel ever had. 

He felt.

Cas felt happiness when he was accepted by Sam and Dean into their small but intimate family. It was as if a weight had been lifted from his soul.   
His heart aches when he sees them lose all their friends to death, one after the other.   
He feels guilt at how much pain they endure due to his very own brothers.   
He feels love for them, profoundly and deeply.   
But most of all, he feels pain, agony that threatens to steal his breath, when he realises the dark road that surely lies before the brothers.

But he knows that however difficult that road might get, no matter how much torment it brings to them, they will get through it, if only for each other's sake, if only to prove heaven wrong. They will always keep fighting, with the same fierceness and determination. 

And so will he. 

He might not be welcome in heaven any more, but it's worth it. The freedom is worth it. Sam and Dean are worth it. 

So he will fight.  
But not for victory or glory or power. Not to prove his strength to anyone.

No

He will fight for the day long car journeys, with Metallica blaring over the roar of the engine. He will fight for the late night meals of greasy cheeseburgers and salads. He will fight for the dry sarcastic humor and the never ending pop culture references. He will fight for the senseless brotherly squabbles. He will fight for the constant teasing and the jokes. He will fight for the reassuring pats on the back and the small comforting smiles.   
He will fight for that fierce yet tender brotherly bond, the overwhelming, deep-seated devotion that knew no limits.  
He will fight for happiness, peace, love and forgiveness.

He will fight for free will.


End file.
